Endings and Beginnings
by Nanci Bradley
As 2024 draws to a close, it is once again time to begin reflecting on the past year. This practice allows me to celebrate each of my wins, all of the ways I have grown and changed throughout this year. And it offers me a sense of direction for next year, based on where I am at this moment.
Reflecting and setting intentions for the future doesn’t have to be a yearly thing either – you can practice this as often as you wish. Personally, it is by reflecting on the past and creating a sense of direction for the future that I can more easily dedicate my full attention to the present.
So, what does this actually look like in practice?
Step 1: Reflecting
Personally, I love to journal, and so this reflection process often involves writing down past situations, thoughts and feelings. Noting them down without judgement, allowing any new understandings or connections to be made based on this information, but also not forcing myself to be overly analytical either.
You might want to list any situations that triggered large emotional reactions, noticing whether the emotion is still present or whether you have begun transmuting the energy. Perhaps these triggering emotions resulted in physical reactions, if you want to begin learning a new way of reacting to these emotions, that may be something to note down for the next phase.
Remember to note down the ways you pushed yourself out of your comfort zone in big or small ways, whether it was making a speech in front of thousands or a comment to a stranger. Celebrating these is important, as well as feeling grateful for the ways in which you grew this year.
Even reflecting on the habits that you maintained, that helped you during difficult periods, whether that was seeing a therapist, an exercise habit, or a mandatory lazy hour each day.
Reflecting is the most intuitive and individual aspect of this three step process.
There is no correct way of doing it – you may simply reflect within your mind, discuss it with someone you trust, or write a long letter to yourself.
Do what feels right to you – but remember to shift out of reflection eventually, and reflect with compassion for yourself, both now and in the past.
Step 2: Intention
Setting intentions for the next stage of life often allows me to spend less time obsessing about the future. In a way, it allows me to designate time to dwell on the future, so that I can make a habit of redirecting my focus to the present in any other moments of my day.
Intention setting is my more gentle way of saying goal setting. The reason for this change is that goal setting can sometimes be quite harsh – if I don’t achieve ‘this’ by a certain date, I feel that I have failed. This is not the case for everyone, of course, and if you love to set goals than feel free to use the word as often as you like!
But in this context, I am referring to these as intentions – as these are things we will be striving towards and creating plans to fulfill, but with leeway for the intention to shift as we do.
Often, the easiest way to do this is to write a list.
Perhaps you will want to include categories to place the intentions under, perhaps you will simply write them as they come into your mind.
Another aspect to improve this process, is to word your intentions as if they have already happened, as if you are writing this list at the end of 2025 as part of the reflection process.
For example:
Instead of – ‘I want to earn $100 000 in 2025’
Say – ‘I earned more than $100 000 this year’
Instead of – ‘I find a partner who respects my boundaries and treats me with deep love’
Say – ‘I am in a healthy romantic relationship, where we respect each other’s boundaries and always show up for each other with love’
Instead of – ‘I go on holiday to Bali’
Say – ‘My holiday to Bali was relaxing and everything flowed very easily’
By writing in this way, we are helping align our brains with the outcome, rather than dwelling in the lack of the thing we want.
There is flexibility in the way we word these, in the sense that we can focus on whatever is most important for us. For example, you could focus on how you will feel, you could be very specific about what you want, you could write the time frame you would prefer, etc.
For some of you, this will be the end of this practice. You may pack away the list until next year to see what came to fruition. For others, it will feel more aligned to regularly check in on these goals and realign your actions to the outcome you desire.
Step 3: Being Present
When you fulfill both of these steps, we reach what can be the most difficult stage, as it is a practice, rather than a one-time activity. Being present in the moment, placing as much focus as possible on the here and the now, is something I find easier when I know that I have already figured out everything I need from the past and future in this moment.
So rather than constantly dwelling in the past or the future, do your best to intentionally and consciously focus on what you are doing right now. The words you are reading, the position of your body, the breath moving in and out of your lungs.
Remember to come back into that space of conscious awareness as often as you can, to actually live your life rather than living in the past that is gone or the future that is ever changing. We are only truly living in the present moment, I invite you to exist within it as often as you can.
Begin your journey today!
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